The Second Date; Make The Most Out Of It
I love first dates, I truly do, but I have to say I’m over them. There’s so much build up, so much pressure (not to mention uncomfortable shoes) and don’t even get me started on the billions of articles out there about first dates. Really, it’s all a big to do about one night, and when you stop to think about it, it isn’t THE most important.
It’s definitely special; this is where first impressions are made and hopefully the first sparks fly. And the legendary third date is where, according to tradition, you let your new sweetie see your sexy under things. Of course, nowadays it’s altogether possible that that magic moment happened at any time, from pre-first date until your wedding night. But still, I think we all continue to get the third date rush.
The date that comes in between one and three (that would be number two!) really doesn’t get the attention it deserves. In my opinion, the second date is where you discover the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. First date jitters are a memory; you’re more relaxed and less nervous than the first time around. More importantly, even though there is a mutual attraction, the overwhelming thoughts of sex are usually on the back burner. The newness of it all though make this date exciting!
This is the dating sweet spot. And there are certain things you can checklist to make sure you’re making the most of this unique event:
Do a lot of listening
First of all, relax and be prepared to listen. You obviously did well on the first date or you wouldn’t be here for a second date. So settles your nerves and put your brain back in gear. You need to focus less on making yourself look good and focus more on being genuinely interested in the other person. Listen, and take the information you’re given to heart. Allow it to make the person across from you become more complete.
Up the flirting
Though flirting isn’t a super serious matter, it is important to up your flirting on date number two. Oftentimes people slip into “friend” mode on date number two; a crucial mistake. If there are no sexual undertones to the date, but it’s obvious that you are enjoying yourself, chances are your date is going to think you want to be friends and nothing more.
If you want your date to believe that all you want is friendship, good enough. But I’m guessing you don’t; so flirt it up and make your intentions clear.
Never mind the boxes
By boxes, I am referring to preset parameters around all kinds of things: yourself, this brand new relationship with another person, the other personany of it. You’ve been out one time. Don’t assume that you know exactly who the other person is. Don’t pretend to know exactly who they see you as. Definitely don’t think you have your relationship put in a neatly labeled box either. At this point, anything could still happen.
